The Fuss Over T-list Yesterday

It's almost 4 in the morning and yet, am still awake in bunch of thought. Again.
It was started last night, I slept early at 7 and waking up at 10 from a sudden call for another job desc.

Skip this part already.

So then the fuss in my timeline on this thing: https://twitter.com/search?q=%23IDtanpahomofobia&src=hash
In the morning, rejection came not as big as what I felt last night and continue until right now. So at first, my apologize IF my writing is that offensive, or you may think I am that conservative. But I am simply giving my thought. You are might thinking that at some point you are right, and the actual truth, is vice versa. Because I know we are all worshiping freedom and humanity right now. And I know there is no the rightest parameter to decide the rightest and the wrongest. So, I simply want we all blend, when you have already spoken what you think is right, and that is your right as human, so am I now.



I personally and sincerely think that the tagline of "against homophobia" is okay. What kind of human are we if we fear each other, insult each other, and marginalize each other? Yesterday morning all are pretty fine when my timeline is simply telling that they have family, friends, relatives, etc who are LGBTs. And they respect them. I have mine, too. And I am pretty get along nice with them. But then, my mind cannot goes along well when suddenly, the "celebration day" came up with some people, having their own kultwit, philosophically-approaching, saying that Homosexuality is okay, and not a disorder.

Hey, is the essence of the day has quite much dragged along?

I think the day is all about how we should respect all kind of people. Because people do really are not defined by anything they choose. But, the problem here is how I see at certain thing.

I might be conservative. Too way conservative in some values that I still uphold. I might not that acknowledged. But I believe all of you have mind, which is exactly consisted of some essence; logic, heart, humanity, value, and faith. What I will say might call another mind which can be smooth or pretty judgemental. But whatever it is, I appreciate that.

Homosexuality is not okay for me, personally. I am still thinking that it is called as Sexual "Disorientation" for reason. And status quo that we call people as "Straight" not "non gay" are happening for reason. That we, as human, intentionally or not, still naturally believe that a true nature is coming from heterosexuality.

Why naturally? And why is it a disorder? We do have a nature as human. And I still hold to that value which is unbargainable. Because of some point, we, as humans are just too small where universe is way too wide. There will be several things which are out of our control and cannot be explained.

Our nature as human make us have to eat everyday,and properly. And when it comes that people stick their finger to their throats, puking all foods which are they've just eaten then we said them having eating disorder. And I assume people are smart enough to not hate them, instead hold them, respect them, taking care of them, and telling them that is not okay so they have to back eating normally, as how human suppose to eat.

And same goes about love. Eating desire is something that we cannot choose to have when or what (and who for Love case) towards. At first, love may be just simply about two person. But if you are just not being denial, how can you come out from this world without love? Yes, Love makes your race kind preserved. God made first human as Adam and Hawa, as Man and Woman in a bond, for reason. God made you penis and vagina for reason. So this why I am not agree for those who saying that homosexuality is not a disorder. You know that the nature of human is that love happens between man, and woman. That love, cannot be separated from sex. You are made by the combination of Sperm and Ovum. By Penis met Vagina. Not from an oral or anal.

Let's say that loving anyone is a right. And everyone deserved their pursuit of happiness. But then how can you expect to be loved rightly when since beginning what you do is opposing human nature? Is it righteousness still there?

And also. Being homosexuality is a human right. We all want to be hand in hand as human. And humanity should be accepted universally, which, upholding all kind of races, ethnic, and religions. But then, you know, I personally believe and pursue all kind of rights that make me human, all kind of rights which we are deserved. But don't be a very big and too deep worshiper of human rights. Human rights should actually there when it is not harming any other person's right. Which is I believe that we are here because of God, not just suddenly *poof* and happens. (judge me conservative). And to that, so we build connection through God, the power that beyond our control, by religion (call me conservative again). Faith I have is also my right. And then I am still believing that, if, you are committed in one religion, there will be several values which is cannot be bargained even by the human rights.

So that, why we are not simply maintaining our humanity through what our religion have told us so? If you deny this, look deeper on your own religion (and I am still doing it, too) you will see that actually its value will tell you humanity. Humanity on the right track. Still in the nature path. No religions told you to harming the others.

Then again, the conclusion is: yesterday International Day Against Homophobia was quite dragged along. It should be a reminder for us that we should be act as human, who still hand in hand to be one, who still same without any differences. But then the essence of yesterday changed. Still, for me, Homosexuality is not okay. What if homosexuality come to our nearest person? Are you just by a blink accepting that without even a slight denial in your heart? I believe IF you are still human, you will. So, tell them that homosexuality is not okay. If they decline. Then okay, at least you tell. For the rest is back their own. That is your very first duty. And your last duty is? Making them as a part of you, respect them, not hating them. And for the rest, I simply believe it is God, and Universe's turn to work.



My sincerely thought.
-C

Once Upon A Time

So once upon a time, there was a girl. Who might seemed live but lifeless, seemed breath but almost every single thing she did was wrong. When it went right, it's just God being nice. She lived impassionately, She simply had wants. But it did not reach the point until she try to made the wants happen.

So there she was. Live, but pointless. She live day by day by simply pursued for happiness. Which was exactly not real. Pseudo. Here, but momentary and temporary. She still pursued some of her goals. But mostly of them didn't going smooth. She still did whatever she like, but most of times the things she like suddenly suffocated her until she felt bad toward herself.

She did not need the pity. She even has pitied herself. She sick of being blamed. She did that her own. The things that still made the light inside here eyes, even slight, might be just her wonderful family and how her friends made her laugh for day by day. Even when she was herself the hollow would be there, again.

Some said to her how her life is envy-able. Some hate her to the point even herself recognize them as strangers. Some underestimate her. But some love her that much to the point she feel that she does not deserve that.

But luckily how far she was, and how big the feeling that she was alone. But God is still there. Watch her. And work for her in a very mysterious way.

When God knew that she was on the wrong path. Getting more far from her goals. Getting more not likely what she used to thing exactly the way it was. God works.

God may be tired for warning her in a common way. By failing her in some circumstances, in things she struggled for. But she did not blame it at all. She realized it was all her who not being all herself. Not to do her best.

So God made her a special way. God make her a very special occasion. When she work it to the bone. When it almost finished she thought that was almost perfectly done. Suddenly the world flipped. People think it is not even reaching proper. People strike what she has done out. People even try to pull the trigger to kill her personally in a packaged of what she has done in her job. They don't blame her work, they blame her for being her. They hate her. Until she realized they hate herself since she was in that kind of pointless life period.

They may still hate her until she does not even know when. But a while ago she realized it is the way of God to work in a very mysterious way. To slap her right on her face. To show here that she must rise again, being herself, and fix every single mess she has done towards her own life.

She might be not good enough. But she is thankful for having a very god God.

Maybe, Untitle?

So, how do we start? Hehehe.

Maybe by this: several days ago I promised my self to be back in blogspot eventho I still love tumblr that much. hehe, kidding. For no reasons, I just want my silly writing (eventho noone will actually read it) can be tracked down by noneother than, me.

I guess I mostly wrote shits, I prolly admit. But I also promised my self that no matter what, I have to keep on writing, basically everything. Because I intentionally realized that words are my knives, and they need to be sharpened often. And how much I do realize that words are often-ly pain relieving, tho sometimes this thing which is caused the pain.
So here I am, snuggling in almost dawn on my "hampir berkerak dan penuh sarang laba-laba" blogspot just for adding more rubbish here. :p

Just call it tonight: Things "slaps" me, slow, but awakened.
What happens to me? I do realize it since I am the only one on this planet who said "Perahu Kertas" is so-so. At first I think that that's my fault for reading the book right before watching it. But then, tonight I realize: I lost the focus of my self. I look at that point straight, but some of shadows still keeping on it behind.


I miss you at this highest point this night.

I miss you to the point I feel this kind of pain in all over me.


But it is not like I am willing to go back or something. I miss your presence. And that was my very first mistake for assuming presence will actually bring everything work.

But then I guess I realized, since the longing is based on merely presence. I do miss my Baby Toshiba more than you.

I know, I might be the devilest person in the world for being too loved and too hated.



-C

My -so called- 2 Years Goals

Actually it was my tumblr post, but I'm kinda feel guilty if I'm not posting it. Because my careless upon my blogspot. :p

So, I just get bored and suddenly a train of thought popped out from my mind. I’ve graduated from High School, finally, even though I’m still struggling out to get my dream place to continue for my education, even better, my life. But realizing that maybe I had no accomplished any gigantic achievements during high school, I’m still questioning my self: Why I was doing nothing during those 3 good damn years? Why I didn’t do much much and MUCH-ER better when the opportunities windows were opened for me? For God’s sake, I’m grateful for what God have given to me during high school: a great debate team, 2 years opportunities of Geoscience olympiad, Siswa berprestasi, MPK and OSIS fast track offering. (I swear, a teacher, who is an OSIS tutor even suddenly offered me a fast track for becoming the head of OSIS candidates without joining the organization a year before hand. Which I directly declined giggling like a moron with billion of stupid reasons)

So what’s the matter that make me sad and kinda regret during days after National Exam-and until now- was: How come I’ve just passed my high school time without anything great inside? Kenapa dulu-dulu selama kompetisi gue cuma bisa ngelakuin yg gue bisa? Please, I’ve been taught for doing best for anything since I was in kindergaten. How come? How come?

Maybe you will judge me as an ambitious bitch, but yeah, what’s life without achievements? When your surrounding even going to Germany for students exchange.

So then, why I’m choosing 2 years for my target of time?

Again, 2 years is the time until I reach my end of teenager times.

Again, I don’t wanna passed my golden time again without nothing’s great inside.

Again, it’s just only 2 months before my 18, before being legal. (though how much wishing for being forever 17, like The Cullens)

And tada… Bismillahirrahmanirrahiiim. Here’s the things that maybe I’m gonna to achieve before I reach my 20. You maybe wanna laugh on it out loud. But again, teenage dream speaks :)

1. Accepted in State University. This may be the gate. I don’t know, God is the one’s plan maker. I’m just wishing it so.
2. Joining any debating team again. I’m not lying when I said debate is kinda a part of my life. I feel like Harry being pulled from his muggle world.
3. Starting to read, and write again. My 3 years seems so far away from books, and of course, NEWSPAPER. When I’m typing this out, Mom is so sad because I read none of 3 newspaper she have bought today. I’m too busy for my twitter ‘life’, yes that’s the biggest factor. And don’t ask about writing, all I’ve written during high school were those stupid fan fictions, just a mere journal for my sispres scoring, and yes, just some stupid essay or speech for my school tasks. I’m even dazzling now how come I can write such as criminal stories and even about Konstantinopel, Spain-Andalusia conquest and its black market when I was in 7th grader, 13 years old -_- when I’m 17 just doing nothing.
4. Beneficial for other people. This feeling is just kinda indescribable. Big, and grow bigger and bigger for each day. And you know how much it’s hurt when my capacities haven’t enough yet to make any better benefit. :(
5. I want to teach. for what I got during 9 years study. No, I’m totally not into making teacher as my future job, but really, my Muhammad even said that’s why we learn, to share and give it to another people. I’m maybe that stupid for logarithm and its friend, but again, maybe there’s a little of what I’ve known during my 17 years old life. Especially I really really want to teach for the not having ones, I’m really wishing Allah will hear and make it come true :(
6. it’s what I really really want to achieve in my future varsity. I really really want to join any kind of debate or MUN international competitions. You maybe get it silly, but… Yeah… that’s one of my dreams. And I wish I can achieve it in my life.
7. The last is… Having a good man. Who knows Allah well, who knows what to talk, who knows what to laugh, who knows what to discuss, who knows how to lead, who knows how to handle me, and of course.. Who knows me. Yes, funny. But still, I’m an human with heart. Still needs a shelter, still needs a special place for share, still needs shoulder to cry on. Hahaha sound silly. But again, I have my own right in my own goal-semi-wishing list, right? ;)

Okay that’s all. Hope those all will be accomplished before my August 08 August 2013, before my 20, before the end of my teenagers. Maybe long enough, maybe no one read, but again, I must try to write again, right? :D

Regards,

Me.

Pikiran yang mungkin masih akan melanda sampe setahun kedepan.

Hello, this is just another homey sunday with many things wait to do behind.

But I am share something that actually it's a bit unexplainable, indeed.

Last Night I did some chatting with my seniors on high school.
One of them both is already accepted in Diponogoro University for Law Faculty, and One else is already accepted in University of Indonesia for Social and Political Faculty.

Well, I do I get some benefit info from it. And they're that hilarious to talk and discuss about. They explain for some question that I dunno Who I can ask for, and still lingering on my mind.
They told me about the reasons of why they chose their major.
And I am completely agree.
I have my own desire, big desire, for studying about Social, Politics and Laws in my entire studying life.

But actually there are the problems. When you have to accept that You're a citizen, a kids, and a student of INDONESIA you have to choose (or being chosen) one kinda of major in your high education.
Neither like in USA or another great country in Asia, which is you have your own freedon to choose when you are longing to study (Because They are so many choice for appropriate education institution, there) and Indonesia have about billion students to study in maybe just a few qualified universities.
Ha?
So we must fight for Passing Grade, How many people Interested in, What the most 'safe' major to choose, and How to pay for those expensive College's fees.

Wahahahaha, How's wonderous The Systematical of Education in this Country Is.

And my problem is, I just put my interesting in quite number of Major.
As I've already told that I am interested in Social thingies before.
But Have I already told you? What the heck the Major that I am happy to stuck my brain to study about?
Well, maybe you gonna judge me bad if you doesnt know me well.

First, My big obsession since I was in Junior High school is being a diplomat.
So INTERNATIONAL RELATIONSHIP is a kinda heaven of my whole education life.

Second, I have a dumby thought about for become an influence for the others. Hahahaha my pleasure if you want to Laugh at me OUT LOUD ;)
So, I think take the Law Faculty can be one way of my random thought.

Third, Since I joined in to Geoscience Olympiad. And because of how cool my geography teacher when I was in 10th grade is, suddenly it's THE ONLY ONE OF SCIENCE THINGS THAT I LOVE IT ABOUT!!!
I ever thought about chemical engineering and Fakultas Ilmu tekhnik perminyakan (apalah bahasa inggrisnya, gue ga kepikiran sama sekali), because Chemist look alike the most friendly subject in science!
Hahaha.
But suddenly I realized, gue bukan tipikal orang yang demen ngehabisin berlembar-lembar kertas cuma buat mengolah angka, rumus, ketetapan sialan dan blablabla itu.
Tiba-tiba geoscience dateng kayak Spongebob dengan harpa dan sinar malaikatnya memberi Tuan Crabs ide.
I am suddenly in love with geology.
Why?
Because it needs the comparison about 50:50 buat hafalan sama hitung-hitungannya.
Me likey likey, ayey ayey!

Fouth is Social Anthroplogy.
Sejak gue nonton si Annie Wadrock di Nanny diaries, gue langsung berbinar-binar menyadari betapa kerennya yang bakal dipelajarin di antropologi social.
And it was supported for one matery that I learn in sociology, it dirrectly told how Interested Social Anthropology Social is!
Hahaha call me freak or whatevsss of it.

Fifth are The majors that My heart love it apart.
They are Pshycology and Communication things.
Maybe I shouldn't explain it well.
Most people have already know, betapa diincernya jurusan-jurusan ini.

Sixth, ini sisanya.
Jurusan yang diajukan sebagai solusi oleh orang tua gue.
Kayak Economy things, Major-major yang ada di IPB sama Kedokteran...... Errrr....
I like it, but, well... Maybe I don't know how to through it IF I get them in my hand


However they sound not good, actually.
In Indonesia you have to decide What kind of Job do you prefer in.
My friend already do it, mereka bisa konsen di satu bidang.
Sementara gue?
Errr.... Bercabang-cabang udah kayak rambut medusa.

Tapi masih ada waktu kurang dari satu tahun lagi chyn.
Gue bakal berusaha dan bertanya dengan The Only One who create me, my Lord, Allah SWT.
Dan ditambah ngomong sama mami papi. Bener kata orang, they surely want the best for me.


Berkahi jalanku, Ya Allah.

Emo Devil Feeling.

It's actually getting reach midnight.
But what the hell am I doing?
Laying a side on my bed, do some blogging with my best-best friend, "The Red". Lol
And actually it's really really a dumb act. Why? I have so much tight activity to do tomorowzzz. Those following examinations, a kinda of some plans, and Nurul Fikri. (well, mungkin gue agak lebay ya bilang tight schedule)


So, (maybe) you asked : hey dumby, so why don't you take a rest now?
The answer is : Hey wisy, I need some sweet escapes for my Bad mood, Emo feeling.
Hahaha yeah yeah you're right. I am gonna ragging again in this update.
It's like I just want to enjoy my hapinnes my self, dont wan't to share ;P

If you don't like it, stop to continue. It's just my own way to think about something which is going random my own.

It's started suddenly, beetches. Who's the one I can blame?
Myself.
For give my good feeling to bad mood, and like admitted it a wholeheartedly.
Good job, Chyntia. Good job!
I am always giving any talks to people for not being beatten by the mood.
But?


Hah, it happens suddenly sih emang. Everything seems quite well before I took a nap this afternoon.
Okay...
Quite well...
I've just felt the high of proudness, felt the satisfactory of my thought and awareness, Being given any compliments from some mates.
Until suddenly, Adzan is up in the air, and the devil said : "Hey Hey it's a really really comfy peace condition, just go! Have some rest!"
And the, Here I was... Closing my eyes ignoring the adzan

Astagfirullohalaziiiiiiiiim.


And suddenly: DANG!
The devil bad mood came.
I get up on half past five, And having lately Ashar. And tadaaaa... I was so much feeling unnecessarily bad when My sist come home.
I hate for her inappropiate act (for me, personally. When in that emo feeling)
And theeen, my mom came.
I felt emo and she felt terribly tired.
A perfect combination for drag the badmood devil to my mind.
I.FELT.QUITE.LAZY.TO.DO.SOMETHING.

So the conclusion is :
I HAVE TO REARRANGE MY RESTING TIME.



Including, NOW!!!



SHUT DOWN "THE RED", PUH-LEEEEEASE!!!

HEY TAKE ME TO NARNIA OR NEVERLAND, NOW!!!

YA ALLAH YA RABB, INI APAAN YA ALLAH? GA KUAT BENERAN PENGEN LARIIIIIIIII.

If I could tell how much I feel the vain inside, I don't know what's supposed to I do even to calm my self down.


GA AKAN LAGI-LAGI GUE MENYANGGUPI PERMINTAAN SEKOLAH YANG GA MASUK AKAL.

Ya Allah beneran mau nangis ini aaaaaah :'''''(

For everything's sake, gue baru tau yang namanya doing something under pressure and being catched by the deadline.
It feels like you want to go go away, ignore the obligation that ACTUALLY you musn't get.
Ya ALLAH BENERAN ASTAGHFIRULLOHALAZIIIIIM.

HOW COULD I PREPARE MY SELF FOR ACADEMIC, ART AND SCIENTIFIC WORK IN THOSE FUCKING THREE DAYS?!!!!!!

:''''''''''''''''''''''''''(


Ps : sorry for those brokenly english. I can't think clearly how to deal with an aproppiate write. It's just a way to ragging for those terribly hectic condition

Tidak mampu berkata-kata lagi

Hari ini blog sedang tidak bersahabat atau beroposisi dengan saya.
2 postingan saya tidak ada yang bisa diterbitkan.
Bagus.
Saya harus mulai mengata-ngatai ketidakberesan tekhnologi dan indosat darimana?
Well...
*#!'&.;=+*!&)('?&'﹑#:,!'&)(@!!

Last super duper Holy-Holiday

okay, first of aaaaall.

HOWDY BOOGIE-BLOOOOOOOG? uh oh uh oh catch your hand's up, catch your hand's up, Chyntia is here (blaaaah, apadah gue -____-')

oh yaa my lovalovalov blog, I am so sorry I became sooo rude on my last posting. i dunno why, it's just like I am gonna exploding and errupting at the same time. I am soooo angry at that time, and actually that anger still fully on my mind until right now. but whatever, I don't care about that anymore. Just ignore that trash thingy and gotta move on wiff my life ;)

well, gue gatau kenapa tiba-tiba gue kepengen posting, tiba-tiba tangan gue gatel aja gitu buat ngeblog. mungkin gue mau share foto-foto aja kali yaaaa at first

okay I am sooo sorry if I placed those photos wrongly, soalnya aku masih belum berpengalaman dalam ngeblog hihi sok imut lo chyn.

itu foto-foto yang gue ambil pas lagi holideh kemaren, not a long weekend holiday sih. tapi lumayan puas laah gue walau badan gue abis demam tinggi pas lagi trip itu ahaha I don't care no one and nothing can ruin my holy holiday!!!  (oke, ga nyante emang gue -__-')

awalnya sebenernya badan gue sehat-sehat aja, mski rada pilek meler-meler nyebelin gimana gitu, tapi suddenly I've got a heavy fever on 3pm in bandung. gilaaaa bayangan gue udah madesu aja tuh... liburan bakal batal... lalu gue pulang ke bekasi... Ouch, fucking no way!

tapi emang dasar emak sama tante gue tukang jalan, dan gue pun ngeyel minta liburan tetep jalan gue pun di ungsikan ke dokter jam 5 subuh. blaaah abis.

gue pun istirahat dan dipakein plester kompres demam bye-bye fever sama adek sepupu tercinta gue si chika. and you know, gue ketagihan sama plester bye-bye fever jadinya........HAH who cares? zz

okay, skip about bye-bye fever thingy.

jam 1 siangnya gue paksain jalan. niat awalnya ke jogja tapi everybody have a doubt about it, mengingat demam gue yg belum turun. tapi gue maksa-maksa akhirnya mereka bilang "oke, kita liat aja ntar yaaa sesampenya dimana. yang jela kita ga bakal liburan di bandung kok"

great, liburan gue tanpa tujuan -_-'

then gue pun berangkat, semper mampir di unpad buat istirahat di kosan tante dan gue rada imbisil disana dengan berkeliaran di unpad dengan plester bye-bye fever masih nyantol dijidat gue. hahaha So what? calon kampus gue ini. hahaha amiiiin amin.

lalu gue pun jalan, mungkin karena pengaruh obat mostly gue tidur selama dijalan. bangun-bangun udah di sumedang, terus bangun-bangun lagi udah di cirebon, terus di kuningan, terus di jawa tengah. whatde?!! -,-

akhirnya gue transit disuatu tempat named Guci hot spring di daerah tegal, Jawa Tengah. karena bokap udah kecapekan banget dan atas referensi dari temen-temen nyokap yang bilng tempat itu indah banget. tapi karena kita udah malem nyampe sananya gue gabisa liat apa-apa -_____-'

terus kita check in di cottagenya, oh You guys should try to have a vacation there deeeh.

gilaaa puncak kalah abiiiiis, disana semuanya masih alami banget, cottage murah ama bagus juga, sama ga serame dan sesumpek puncak lah the most I like about that place.

nyampe cottage gue menggigil hebat, ketauan gue belum sembuh banget dan masih ngeyel.

But fortunately I have two greatest woman in my life my beloved mom and auntie, who is really nicely take care about me, malem itu gue bisa tidur dengan nyenyak dan bangun udah sehat paginya.

dan bener paginya gue bisa liat dengan jelas kalo tempat itu bener-bener menakjubkaaaaaan. gilaaaaa keren abis itu pemandangan, belum kebun-kebun strawberrynya, belum sawah-sawah sama gunung-gunungnya aaaaah orak abis gue takjub ngeliat itu semua.

but the masterpiece is... ITS WATERFALL!!! yang buat unik sih sebenernya karena itu masih alami banget, terus yang ngalir itu air panas. not cold breeze water like another waterfall. aaaaah gila langsung sembuh gue saat itu juga hahaha.

like unusual I've take some picture there, and then continue my destination to cirebon. gajadi ke jogja, ga jadi ke semarang. bener dah ga ada yang bisa mengalakan jiwa petualang nyokap dan tante gue, maen bablas, maen berhenti, maen transit, asal ganti tujuan -____-

dan gue pun nyampe cirebon, mostly disana gue isi dengan history trip sama wisata kuliner. whoo-hoo. and then gue balik lagi ke bandung abis itu

lalu liburan gue pun ditutup dengan indah dengan amazing dinner dipuncak. benar sekali kawan-kawan, saya mampir ke puncak dulu sebelum pulang kebekasi hehe jalaaaaan teruuuus.

gue pun pulang ke bekasi, dan mendengar keluh kesah temen-temen gue yang kesel di rumah aja hahaha. I am so sorry to hear that, folks ;)

well, ujung-ujungnya gue posting tentang liburan gue, padahal tadinya gue ada hasrat buat posting soal year's review and resolution hehe anytime kali yaaaa.

Okay that's all from me, thankyou blog for such as an trash to keep me throw and share eeeeeeee--verything ahaha kidding.

Xo!

Alivia Chyntia Rianti :)

Bad Romance or Worst Romance?

HAHAHAHANJEEEEEENG, LOL! EXTRA SUPER DUPER LOL!!!!
Oke gue tau ga pantes emang maki-maki di blog. but who cares? woooy ga tahan gue wooooy hahaha sinting dah gua sintiiiing.

FYI, I've even never love you boy!!! NEVER!!!
See?
If you want to know the happiest truth about its romance is... I am only feel that YOU'RE ADDICTIVE, I AM JUST FEEL THAT JOY OF YOUR ATTENDANCE IN MY LIFE.

it's normal thing, right? when you're just feel happy and comfy when someone around you, THAT'S IT. Yeah only it.

yeah honestly sometimes I am feel that jealousy about your 'habitual of loving another girls'. but is that wrong? AT THAT TIME I WAS THINKING THAT YOU'RE THAT SPECIAL ONE. I often feel the same jealousy wiff other guys, too. hahaha sound's creepy, but jealousy is just an humanly feeling that can't mean for something important.
okay skip about that jealousy. gue mau lanjutin soal maki-maki ini. but maybe in english is the appropiate way to fload all of my thought this time.

you're the perfectly bastard.
that's it.
munafik lo. sometimes I feel so damn guilty about that innocence face, begging for forgiveness... begging but for me...
But it's just a fake angel face.
itu semua palsu.
ternyata lo menyimpan kebohongan dibelakang gue, sakit tau gak? iya SAKIIIT!!!
these are sooooo many fucking fake devil attitudes behind your angel face, banyak hal menjijikan yg gabisa dirubah dari lo. banyak.

udah cukup yaa chyn, cukup kebegoannya, bersyukur lo ga pernah nebar rasa sayang lo buat dia. it's just QUITE priceless.
masih banyak hal penting yang lo harus pikirin dan jalanin ke depannya.
life is about keep the the head held high, just ignore those meaningless rubish thingies.

xo.

Lagi Labil.

LABIL.
LABIL.
LABIL.
dan LABIL.

Ini yang bener-bener gue rasain sekarang. Gatau faktor apa yaa, gue merasa labil banget akhir-akhir ini. Gue jadi gampang banget buat nagis ga jelas, tereak-tereak marah dan bukan ga mungkin abis itu gue bisa langsung seneng lagi.
Ga itu aja, pikiran gue juga labil banget Ya Allah

Sometimes I was thought That it was a Kinda of happiness. but It's often say that I am A BIG FOOL becuz of I love it

gue sebenernya ga suka kaya gini, gampang banget terombang-ambing ga jelas kaya gini. Padahal seharusnya gue bisa lebih baik dari ini, halaaah.
Tapi seriously This condition hurting and annoying meeh so much.
gue capek.
gue capek terus-terusan merasa diri gue yang paling bener, dan pada akhirnya itu cuma bikin masalah baru buat gue.
ya itu tadi, karena kelabilan ini.
faktor umur mungkin kelabilan ini?
ya bisa jadi.
tapi ga bisa nyalahin faktor ini terus juga kali yaa. kalo ga dari gue sendiri yang bisa mengontrol diri gue.

postingan ini sebenernya lebih kaya pengakuan sih yaa, mungkin dengan ini bisa jadi perenungan buat diri gue sendiri.
satu lagi pengakuan gue, terkadang disaat orang tua sibuk nyalah-nyalahin gue, gue sering banget mikir "masih banyak kok anak diluar sana yang lebih buruk dari gue, gue masih dalam kadar normal sebenernya"
tapi sebenernya itu lebih kaya pikiran idiot, gue sadar.
lebih banyak anak yang bisa lebih baik di luar sana.
and it's totally make make me realize.
that I have to be better.
And I have to be The best.
ga usah lebay, cukup jadi yang terbaik buat diri gue, orang tua gue, keluarga gue, dan lingkungan gue sendiri.
I have to accomplished aaaall of my goals in my life, no matter how sucks the winding roads that I'll through.
I HAVE TO GET IT, YEAH... HAVE TO.


hahaha jadi berlebihan emang gue kalo lagi in the down-est side of this labile thingy, hmm.
Tapi semoga ini bisa jadi perenungan buat gue kedepannya supaya bisa jadi lebih baik lagi.
Amin.



Sincerely,
Alivia Chyntia.

Antara logika dan perasaan, saya lebih memilih logika.

Gue nyesek, nyesek banget.
Tapi lucunya gue gatau kenapa bisa kayak gini? How could is this happen hah?
Alesan Pertama mungkin karena sudah jalannya perasaan wanita begini yaa. Gampang banget berubah, bisa drastis banget cuma gara-gara hal sepele terkadang.
Tapi gue gatau apa faktor itu yang mempengaruhi ke-hectic-an perasaan gue sekarang?
Sedikit banyak iya.
Gue sebel terombang-ambing kaya gini.
My mind is totally mess. Kadang gue udah muak banget sama semua ini, tapi ga jarang juga gue rindu sama hal ini.
So? Gue yang bego?
Mungkin.
Tapi lo semua harus tau, kalo yang namanya ngikutin perasaan sama logika itu susah banget, banyak banget godaannya.
Kadang kalo logika gue udah main, that's strongly shouted that I HAVE DONE WITH THIS, "udahlah chyn, apa bagusnya? Udah bikin muak banget ini. Jijik juga kan lo lama-lama kepleset sama hal bego begini?"

Tapi kalo perasaan yang maen, gue ga tega. Gue kadang kasian juga.
Heeeeeeeem -______-

Ya udahlah, mungkin ini gimana pinternya gue nyelesaiin masalah yang satu ini.
Bisa nggak gue nyelesain ini sendiri?
Semoga bisa, logika gue berkata lebih daripada perasaan gue.
Sekalipun gue ga akan pernah kembali ataupun hanya sekedar berbalik.

I've promised to my own self, and I have to keep hold on it.
And I am pretty much sure about it.



Sincerely,
Alivia Chyntia Rianti

many things that's going around nowaday :)

Hey boogie-blogs hahaha what a freak.
What's up? Soooooo sorry I am not taking care of you for a while.
I am just stuck in busy things, aaaand I dunno which part of my life stories that I supposed to tell ya hihihi.

Suddenly I've just done a blog walking, and hellyeah.. I realized how much I am missing do B-A-C-O-T in my own blog. Lol.
So I decide to write back on you, lova blog :3

Firstly maybe I wanna tell about someone, who really succesfully ruin my perfect days hahaha I knoooow, That's sound pretty much cruel. Buuttt sometimes I feel that it's pretty much disturbing, too.

I just wanna tell : Thankyou very much for those words which is being dedicated to me. But honestly, I EVEN dont' need it.
JELAS?

Oke, cukup masalah klarifikasinya hahaha apadeh gue

Lanjuuuut, secondly.
You do goo oh ah ah (?)
Hellyeaaaaaaah, kemaren 26 November 2009 akhirnya GUE KESAMPEAN NONTON NEW MOON.
Oke, gue tau kedengeran anak kampung banget gua hahaha.
Tp oh my, I m so proud including early watching it.
Disaat orang-orang baru berencana nonton, gue udah doooooong (bangganya)
Perjuangan juga nontonnya, but shitty shit, nonsense lah ama perjuangannya. Yang penting udah kesampean ;p
Overall, New Moon doesn't satisfied me, enough.
Gatau kenapa, gue pikir twilight lebih baik dari newmoon.
Twilight is pretty much showing its uniquely characteristics.
Not like New Moon, sometimes it was boring in some parts. Aaand it's look a like another a forbidden love story ever. Mehe-mehenya terlalu banyak, padahal itu bagian tergelap dari hidupnya si isabella swan.
Tapi gue rasa twilight jauh lebih gelap nuansanya, khas banget.


Tapi gue rasa pasti banyak yaa yang ga sependapat sama gue.
No offense, yang namanya taste beda-beda pasti :)


But the greatest part that is I LOOOOVE IT SO DAMN is THOSE HOTTIE CUTTIE WEREWOLVES GUYS
Ow ow ow :3
Dari awal gue emang udah yakin banget, jacob black is more appropiate buat jadi the next crush victim gue daripada si edward cullen.
Meski gue harus adu bacot tiada henti sama partner twilight saga gue : ADISTY WISMANI PUTRI untuk mempertahankan argumen gue hahaha
Entahlah, gue gasuka aja sama model-model muka begitu hehe
Hahaha maaf lagi yaaaaa kalo ga sependapat ;)


Terus satu hal lagi yang gue tunggu banget dari New Moon.
Those Volturi clan.
Tapi agak kecewa nih gue, volturi digambarin disana agak kurang 'wah' dan 'spektakuler' kayak di novelnya.
Kurang spesifik aja gitu digambarinnya.
Tapi bener deh, bagian terbaiknya itu di Dakota Fanning (as jane-red)
SHE IS TOTALLY AWESOME.
Meski cuma beberapa scene aja, tapi keren banget dia. Dapet banget menawan sekaligus sadisnya.


At all, New moon tetep one of must-have-watched movie for this year.
You'll regret miss that euforia ;)

Heeem, thirdly mungkin gue bakal cerita bagian yang paling mengganggu dalam hidup gue sekarang ini. Yang mungkin lagi banyak dirasain for those fifteen until seventeen pales.
Tapi mungkin ga sekarang kali yaaaa.
Nanti ah gue bikin part sendiri soal itu, sekalian ngebetulin blog gue disana-sini yang udah aneh sama jelek banget ini -_______-
Soalnya sekarang saya ngetik ini pake si merah tersayaaang hehe


Catch ya later, blog.
Love.
a!

caring thing

orang ngomong ga peduli sebenernya cuma buat mensugesti diri mereka aja sebenernya. sama kaya gue, dan gur tau itu bodoh.

sebenernya gue hancur, hancur banget malah.
gue ga suka kaya gini, gue ngomong sama diri gue sendiri kalo gue ga peduli.
padahal apa kenyataanya?
prioritas pikiran gue diisi sama hal yg gue coba acuhkan
segala yang gue lakuin cuma keliatannya aja begitu, padahal pikiran gue nerawang ke hal itu juga.


padahal gue sendiri yang ragu dari awal
I doubt whether I am just his toys
I doubt about what exactly he feels
even I doubt with my own feeling

ketawa deh lo semua bacanya.
bener. about this endless thingy lagi = GUY.
lol.
lucu emang kadang orang bisa jadi kebalik dunianya cuma karena urusan mewek-mewek kaya gini
tapi surely y'All have ever felt this way before
berusaha ga peduli, nipu perasaan sendiri, dan kadang juga bingung sama perasaan yang berubah drastis banget
HA lagi melankolis banget gue -,-


dulu ibaratnya gue masih bisa nganggep 7 thingsnya miley cyrus appropiate to described this silly thing.
but sorry, semua berubah.
gue juga harus rasional, banyak yang ga bisa dirubah tentang diri lo




I don't love you, like I did yesterday.



sincerely,
alivia chyntia

Hectic me

okay blog, what is going oooon rite now?
yeah i know, i have not posting anything since months ago
too much of twists in my stories heeeeem

dari pembukanya aja udah keliatan ga moodnya, emang iya sih.
i am being an insane now! whoaaaaaaa
there are so many things which really ruin my life right now not only blabala but also blabla APASI GUA KAYA MAU NGARANG ESSAY BUAT LIA AJA ZZZZ

eh wait, wait...
essay.
it's mostly succesfully ruining my life tau ga, tugas sekolah terbengkalai, peer-peer gua yang udah nangkring setumpuk dengan manisnya terbengkalai, HIDUP GUA JUGA TERBENGKALAI ZZZ
gue jadi males ngapa-ngapain, kerjaan gue sehari hari selama libur puasa cuma nangkring di depan komputer kaya abang-abang warnet ckckck GILA SUMPAH GILAAAAA
belon kerjaan gue udah kaya mahasiswa tekhnik nuklir UGM -weits weits- semester akhir
ngejar tutor, ngerombak essay berkali kali, ditolak, browsing more of nuclear-powered reactor, tiap hari ke lia zzz
okeh, cukup deh ngeluhnya. malah tambah muak gue jadinya -,-

Fyi, tanggal 5 september besok my decision banget tuuuuh, final of final lia gue apasi ah
wish me passed it perfectly yaaa pales :)




satu lagi yang bikin gue gila, pengen banget gue neriakin lagu 7 things dikuping lo boy zz
ini hal ter ter ter paling buat gila sekarang
ya Allooooh sumpah gue lebay banget -,-

okay that's all
xoxo
chyntia :]

A LOT OF THINGS YOU THAT YOU SHOULD KNOW WHEN I WAS A LITTLE ANGLE ;]

heeeeey ini sebenernya note gue di facebook. tapi gapapa laaah gue copast ;)))
bcuz you [probably] know about me in this time. ketika gue udah beranjak ke angka 16 tahun :p so, maybe you should know how pathetic and INNOCENT :D i am when i was a young girl in several things.
it doesn't mean anything, just wanna sharing :pp


1. sempet ga bakal di lahirin di dunia gue *halaaaaah*
kenapa?
biasa, eksistensi dokter indonesia yang demen ngibul buat dapet duit. nyokap di boongin, dan di suruh ngangkat peranakannya disaat gue masih 7 bulan ngedokem disana -____-

2. tapi akhirnya gue lahir dengan selamat sentosa pada hari minggu pagi yang cerah tanggal 8 Agustus 1993. rumah sakitnya gue masih inget banget. Di RS mutiara putri bandar lampung. dan sampe sekarang itu RS masih ada aja, ga kemakan oleh jaman :p

3. pas gue kecil gue sempet dikiraiin chinesse ama tetangga2 gue. putih dan sipiiit banget... *sekarang semua itu sudah lenyap termakan polusi kota bekasi* dan orang suka ga percaya kalo gue cucunya alm. kakek gue yang kulitnya gelap banget.
dan apa jawaban kakek gue ke tetangga tetangga?
"halaaaah, martabak aja bisa putih padahal loyangnya item"
hihihi ada ada aja yaaa?

4. orang yang paling gue susahin pas kecil adalah bukan nyokap atau bokap gue. tapi TANTE gue! gue bakal nangis sampe subuh kalo ayunan gue ga ditungguin en di ayunin tante gue SAMBIL BERDIRI dan tak jarang gue ngelepas baju yang udah dipakein nyokap, cuma biar dipakein ulang ama tante gue. ckckck.

5. TAKUT BANGET SAMA YANG NAMANYA BADUT. pernah gue ngamuk jejeritan di ultah gue yang ketiga padahal tamu tamunyaudah nunggu hampir sejam, cuma karena kue ultahnya gambar badut. ckckck
dan ketika first time gue ke dufan, bukan have fun malah yang ada sepanjang jalan gue mewek ngumpet di paha tante gue di wahana such as istabon, balada kera dan kalo ketemu om badut :p

6. jiwa kemaskulinan [atau keganjenan?] gue mulai tampak sedari dini. soulmate gue yang pertama juga cowok. namanya kakak izul. tapi karena gue imut banget pas kecil, gue manggilnya "tata ijul". dan tak jarang setiap gue diajak berenang, gue bukannya maen ama sodara sodara gue, eeeh malah gue kejar kejaran ama bocah bocah laki ga jelas --"

7. begitupun dalam soal TOA gue. pas gue tinggal di palembang dikala umur 3 taun, orang yang paling dipercaya buat manggil tukang aer yang lewat itu GUE. dengan panggilan khas gue, "banyuuuuuuuuuuuu........."

8. barang yang SEKALIPUN TAK PERNAH LUPA gue masukin ke keranjang belanjaan emak gue itu adalah TEH KOTAK. yaa... teh kotak yang sampe sekarang masih merajalela. bukan coklat atau permen kea bocah kebanyakan. dan ternyata, banyak banget foto gue yang lagi pose ama teh kotak pas kecil dulu hahahaha. sempet gue tanyain ke nyokap, kenapa gue ga didaptarin jadi brand ambassadornya TEH KOTAK? hihihi :p

9. gue sering banget bertindak sok pahlawan pas bocah. kalo keluarga besar lagi ngumpul, maybe karena muka gue yang imyud dan innocent banget kali yaaa, gue sering banget ditawarin beli somay, bakso, dkk. dan itu CUMA BUAT GUE! dan gue si mau mau aja. tapi pas abangnya udah dipanggil, gue malah manggil sodara sodara gue buat beli itu makanan dan gue sendiri malah kaga jadi beli.
dan walhasil tante gue langsung speechless pas tau dibikin tekor ama ponakannya yang manis ini :pp

10. dan dari kecil gue udah sok cinta laura banget gyahahaha. sering banget pas gue ngeliat binatang pasti langsung gue ngomong, "mommy, it is a cat?" whehehehe

11. pas gue masih TK A, maenan favorit gue adalah berandai-andai naek pesawat ke luar angkasa ama temen2 gue yang punya daya khayal spektakuler juga. kita duduk melingker di bawah pohon sambil tereak tereak. dan kalo ada temen gue yang teriak kalo ada alien yang nyerang, apa tindakan antisipasi gue? gue malah pucet dan lari ngumpet dibalik vespa bokap gue :D

12. bandelnya gue setengah mati. sering banget gue ngumpet dibalik pintu pas om gue dateng. dan pas om gue masuk langsung gue serang denagn brutal pake maenan gue. hahaha *tapi sekarang gue remaja santun lhoh, wheheheh*

13. sangat menyusahkan kalo makan. gue punya pola makan aneh yang sering banget ngemut makanan sampe kebawa tidur.
dan lauk favorit gue? ANGGUR, COKLAT, WAFER dan CHIKI. *tapi sekarang semua juga bisa gue makan -_____-*

14. dan satu hal lagi yang merepotkan soal pola makan gue. makanan gue bakal habis kalo gue disuapin sambil genya sibuk sendiri. ga jarang bonyok harus ke taman, tempat mainan, game station, mandi bola, mall, EVEN pelataran MONAS cuma buat nyuapin gue makan :o


15. begitu TK B gue pindah ke bekasi kota patriot ini. gue masuk ke TK bansal 2. dan gue bakal mules kalo kaga ada muka nyokap gue di jendela. embarassing banget.

16. temen pertama gue di TK B namanya DITA APRIANI. sepanjang jalan di jemputan kaga berhenti gue ngoceh ama dia. dan gue sedih banget pas dia harus pulang turun daru jemputan huahahaha. dan tahukah anda? sampe sekarang gue masih beteman baik ama dia :DD

17. pas masih bocah juga gue udah ngegeng. inget banget tuh gue anggotanya. ada si DITA, GINA, NERA ama DIAN. dan katanya gue PALING JUDES DAN BOSSY di geng tersebut -___-
gue ga segen segen kaga ngebolehin temen gue maen di puter2an kalo temen gue kasa ngasih karcis ke gue. ckckck tobat dah gue,

18. GINA PUSPITA RAHMANIA adalah temen gue yang PALING DERMAWAN pas jaman gue TK. ini anak setiap gue puji barang punya dia pasti dia langsung nawarin gue mau apa kaga. dan pernah gue dapet dompet mickey mouse warna ungu yang harus GUE BALIKIN LAGI. gara gara di omrlin ma nyokap! huh. :(((


19. pas teka gue sering banget lari lari ke toilet ama temen temen gue sambil ngikutin gaya cewek cewek yang ada di cardcaptor sakura. hihihi

20.ketidak bakatan gue akan matematika sudah mulai tampak dari gue TK. dan dari hal apa sehingga itu semua bisa terlihat?
GUE SUKA KEBALIK KALO NULIS ANGKA! ga jarang angka 3 gue terlihat seperti huruf a'in -____-
hahahaha. walhasil pernah gue dimarahin abis ama walas gue yang orang aceh itu. dan akhirnya sambil nangis gue minta ajarin dita apriani, temen gue yang paling pinter pada saat itu buat NGAJARIN GUE NULIS ANGKA. poor me.


21.gue pernah dimasukin sanggar, dan gue masih inget banget gue pernah ngelakuin a silly thing pas lagi tampil di depan menteri kebudayaan di TIM. antena kupu kupu gue nyangkut di antena temen sebelah gue pas di pertengahan lagi nari kupu-kupu. bukannya gue lepas, malah gue terusin joget sampe selesai kayak orang lagi joged balon tujuh belasan. ckckck


22. dan akhir masa golden era gue, ditutup dengan pentas seni perpisahaan TK BANI SALEH 2. dan betapa terharunya gue pas gue di nobatkan menjadi ranking ketiga, mengingat tragedi kebalik angka dan kebandelan gue selam tahun ajaran. hehehehe.



okay, that's all. makasih udah baca. gue ga tau kesambet apaaan sempe bisa nulis ginian. perhaps karena keinginan ngeblog gue ketahan rutinitas sekolah :p


x.o.x.o

kejadian bego di LIA.

heem blog sayoooong, akhirnya kesempetan juga mau posting. Padahal minggu besok ada UTS di skola, hihihi tak apalah nanti saja ikhtiarnya [pelajar jaman sekarang begini nih, niat doang. Merealisasikannya mah… ntar ntar aja! ckckck -,-“]


gue mau ngereview ini minggu aja deh. Soalnya kebetulan banget bak kejatohan durian runtuh *bonyok dong gue?* pemerintah Jawa Barat ato maybe sekolah gue baek bangeeeeet ngasih libur 4 hari berturut- turut *ea ealaaaaah, masa libur selang-seling?* . yang bener-bener bikin gue memanjatkan puji dan syukur atas kehadirat Allah SWT *berlebihaaaan*

ehem, gue mulai dari hari sabtu aja yaaa, hari sabtu itu tepat banget sama hari oral test kenaikan level di tempat les gue tercintoooo yang sudah sangat membosankan, namanya… etis kaga yaa nyebutin merk dagang? *hayah, sok intelek gue* hehehe gue les di tempat les yang udah penuh sesek sangking famousnya *serius gue, meski agak sotoy, tapi kenyataan di lapangan tuh!* namanya LIA. Kali buat orang awam kedengeran kea judul sinetron atau nama mbak mbak wanita Indonesia *karena gue jarang denger ada wanita warga Negara Ethiopia pake nama LIA. *tingkat kesotoyan gue makin parah sepertinya*. Tapi ya sudahlaaah, kenapa gue jadi ngebahas soal arti harafiah dari LIA? Gue kan mau ngomongin tentang oral test gue *siapa yang bego kalo gitu, chyn?*

lanjooooot, gue dateng ke LIA dengan muka rada kea alice cullen kurang darah. Pucet lesu tapi tetap mempesona. *Halaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah, beneran minta ditabok orang sekampung ini gue*. gue ngantuk banget saudara saudara! Pengennya mah gue tidur ama keroppi gue. tapi apa daya, GUE HARUS MEMENUHI KEWAJIBAN SEBELUM MENUNTUT HAK. Jangan tanya hubungannya apa, karena aku juga tak tahuuuu ;p

begitu dateng si cindoy udah nyambut gue dengan mulut ternganga menahan nafsu ingin mencurahkan hatinya. *emang hati ada curahan juga? Gue kira bensin doang -,-“*. Astaganagabonar jadi dua, ga tau apa dia mata gue udah merem melek gitu? Tapi berhubung gue teman yang setia terhadap teman dan tak mau makan teman karena teman tidak bisa digantikan oleh siapapun kecuali Skandar Keynes ;p , gue ladenin dah tuh sambil sesekali memberi nasihat petuah wejangan dkk namun tak kadang gue ngelempar panci ke cindy dan marah, “lagian lo ble’e juga si doy! Udah tau si blablabla itu udah berbini. Masiiiiih aja lo demen ama dia!”. Weks tapi saudara saudara, jangan bayangkan cindy itu tante tante umur 3o-an yang merebut suami orang yak. Engga ko, enggaa ^^v Becuz she is still fifteen. Yeah, same like me :D masih imyud imyud :p

lalu karena oral test itu yang maju berdua-dua, otomatis yang laen harus nunggu outside of class. Gue udah ngasih ultimatum GUE HARUS YANG PERTAMA MAJU, sengak banget emang, abis masa udah setaun gue kebagian di pertengahan mulu. Kan males nunggunyaaaaa. Huh 

terus pengujinya datang. Dan pupuslah semua harapan gue, gyaaaaaaaaaaaaaa, >.< dia bilang oral test kali ini sendiri sendiri dan sesuai urut absent. Kenapa pupus harapan gue? KARENA GUE ADALAH ABSEN PALING TERAKHIR! Sia-sia hasil narik urat leher *nyolong bahasa nyokap nih. Hihihi ;D* ama anak sekelas. Gue mutusin buat belajar en ngereview ulang pelajaran gue. karena mau ga mau gue harus ngakuin kalo level gue yang sekarang ini tingkat kesulitannya udah parah juga. Gila aja kalo ampe kaga naek, bisa memalukan nusa bangsa dan agama banget tuh. Dan kebetulan banget level gue yang sekarang ini, absensi gue CUKUP kocar-kacir akibat telalu banyak kegiatan di sekolah yang ga selesai selesai. *sok sibuuuuk* yang makin memperbesar kemungkinan gue FAILED. Oh tidak :O

jujur aja ada 1 unit yang sekelas pada angkat tangan. Yaitu tentang the search for a fuel-cell car. Denger judulnya aja gue udah eneg setengah mampus. Dan ini diperparah oleh fakta kalo gue kaga masuk pas lagi pembahasan unit itu. WTFWTFWTF :o

gue pelajarin itu unit setengah mati. Sambil gue berdoa biar gue kaga dapet itu unit. “yya Alloooh, tolong banget yya Allooh. jangan sampe saya dapet unit itu. nyerah deh saya yya Alloooooh” untung pas gue lagi berdoa kaga ada lampu sorot atau backsound. *terlalu dramatis itu mah*

gue udah mulai gedeg tuh, sejam gue nunggu… belon juga giliran gue. dua jam… gurunya malah istirahat. Sialan. Temen gue yang udah pada di test Cuma ngejampe-jampein gue biar gue bisa tabah dan sabaaaaaaaaaar. Si fifi temen gue yang akseleran jenius aja sampe keluar ogebbnya. Bolak-balik dia nyetel lagu themesong dufan. Ckckck akselerasi atau menunggu sudah membuatmu seperti ini temaaaan? Aku turut prihatin.

Tiga jam berlalu, jujur aja gue udah tinggal sisa-sisa tenaga terakhir. Badan udah pusing, kepala lemes, kaki ngantuk. Udah beware banget deh. Akhirnya gue dipanggil tepat saat azan maghrib. Gilaaaaaaaaa. Udah hilang tuh semangat gue yang menggebu. Lalu test pun dimulai:

Gue : good afternoon, miss.
Miss : good afternoon. Are you the last?
G : yeah, I am the last. I am almost getting tired now miss.
M : ya I know. Ur student card? And please read number blablabla
G : here it is. Okay, this one?

Dan mampuslah gue. gue dapet unit yang paling gue hindarin. Doa gue ga manjur! Huhuhu :’( gue cuma bisa berjuang sekuat gue. hiyaaaaaaaaaaaat. Gue baca deh itu teks. Masih permulaan. Selesai baca missnya nunjukin gue gambar mobil canggih gitu. Dia tanya apa yang gue liat dari gambar itu. Yaa gue jawab mobil laaah. Odongg juga tu guru -,-“. Terus dia nanya apa perbedaanya ama mobil pada umumnya. Gue jawab aja more luxurious, more modern, faster and blablabla.


#Sampai akhirnya tiba ke pertanyaan klimaks.

Missnya ngasih liat gambar kereta super cepat bawah tanahnya JEPANG. Gelaaaaaa, gue masih ngereka-reka itu guru maunya apa.
M : so what do you see from this picture?
G : a train
M : and is it compatible with Japannese?
G : yeah I think so. Becuz it can fulfill the mobilities of japannese that need fast time

M : and if government build this kind of train in Indonesia? Is it will be more effective?
G : I don’t think so.
M : why?
G : bcuz of the mentality of Indonesian people is not proper for this modern train one. Like there are Indonesian people do not want to pay the ticket, and often to reach the… heeeem… [mampus gue stuck sama kata atep gerbong kereta! gyaaaa begimana ini?]
M : heeh? [nungguin jawaban gue]
G : to the up… up… up… [tangan gue sambil meragain atep gerbong kereta]


Walhasil gue jadi ngerasa kea Hermione Granger di Harry Potter pertama pas kaga bisa naekin sapu terbang *halah*


Yaudah gue nyerah ajalah. Gue bilang aja, “ I forgot what is it be called, maybe upside of the train”. Huahahahaha, ngaco. Udah lemes gitu badan gue. terus missnya bilang, “okay, thankyou”

Dan itu artinya test gue selesai juga! Yattaaa. Huraaay. Yippiiiie. Dan stelah seminggu nunggu hasil, alhamdulillah gue naik ke level selanjutnya. Hi-inter III… here we go :D


Tapi anyway, ko gue malah curhat tentang test gue yaa? Katanya pengen curhat tentang liburan durian runtuh gue. ah bodo amat ah, anytime I will tell you all! ;)). Just keep waiting for my following posting
:]





X . O . X . O




-a!-

is it wrong if i miss my past?

hahaha emang konyol gue. sangat konyol! dimana2 orang ga mau nengok ke belakang lagi.
tapi gue?
jujur, gue merindukan bgt kehidupan gue, dulu.
gue rindu ama sahabatsahabat gue yg perfectly in everything, dulu.
gue rindu ama kehidupan sekolah gue, dulu.
gue rindu sama segala aspek kehidupan gue, dulu, yg segalanya balance.
gue rindu ama kebanggaan ama diri gue sendiri, dulu.

bukan kea sekarang.
gue ga lebih kea idiot yg merajut asa tanpa hasil :[

hey yaaa, hahaha proudly gue posting disini dengan media hot spot sekolah gue sendiri.
that's sound freak actually, tapi bodo ah. sekedar ungkapan takjub gue karena kandang kebo ini bisa ngehirup tekhnologi juga akhirnya. nyahahahaha xD

sebenernya gue bingung mau posting apa, karena puncak terberat dari ke-moody-an gue udah berakhir, baruuu aja berakhir. capek, banget malah. sumpah gue ga suka banget nii minggu. kayaknya kepala gue gampang banget meledak. disinggung dikit, mulut gue langsung komat-kamit. orang salah dikit,langsung gue katain idiot. kena omel orang rumah, langsung guenya mencak-mencak.
heeeem so hectic day, hectic week, hectic life :o

gue baru setengah ngetik nih blog sayoooong, eh gue dapet interupsi. ada promosi tempat les segala. hoalaaaaah, apa namanya yaa? hem, STUDYTIME. that sound's stranger, rite? Dengan bangganya mereka bilang lembaga terbaru di Bekasi. hey, konyol.

eh udah dulu ni gue postingnya, leppienya disuruh di tutup --"





X .O . X . O
-a!-
;D

too much to sensitive.

whoaa.
semua muter di kepala gue. di saat gue lagi semangat2nya gini ngejer "ketertinggalan" gue, gue malah jd gampang bgt judes ama orang.
gue makin nunjukin ketidaksukaan gue ama tempat gue sekarang.

heem, mungkin guenya aja kali yaa yg lg kecapekan berat, berangkat pagi... nyampe rumah udah malem. badan udah tinggal remuk aja ini mah.
nyampe rumah langsung tepar, majalah yg udah gue beli dr kpn tau aja blm kesentuh.

gimana tu markar? hhh --"